Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Shoegasm


30 comments:

Anonymous said...

So, I have heard so many stories from women who say that some guy at Home Depot was hitting on her that I am starting to get suspicious. I figure it is either one of two things: one, that Home Depot only hires lonely, desperate, horny guys who can't get a date and therefore have to hit on women in the store, or two, when women are surrounded by all that hardware it somehow fuels this sexual fantasy that all men think they are gorgeous and want them. Now, i have been to Home Depot many times and it seems to me that the guys that work there are perfectly normal and not horny. Therefore, I can't help but think that it is the women who go there who are misinterpreting the employee's friendly and helpful attitude. So ladies, the next time you need some paint or hot glue or whatever, stop and take a moment and take a deep breath. You might be gorgeous and beautiful and cute, but maybe that guy who's helping you might just be nice and helpful because that's his job. And he does it well.

ryanne hodson said...
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ryanne hodson said...

just for the record and to give you a picture of this particular scenario:
this dude called me 'honey' three times, told me i had beautiful eyes
and then came back with "i probably shouldn't be flirting on company time"

so, i can safely say he was doing more than his friendly and helpful job.

my comment and attitude about being "flirted at" and in some instances cat-called on the street has changed over the years from "ew that is so gross, that guy must be so desperate and lame" to "that's right motherfucker, i'm sexy and you obviously can see that, thanks for letting me know that you noticed."

it's all about female empowerment in these situations
and if you think i'm over reacting or misinterpreting some mama's boy at home depot
try walking in my (high heal, leather, retro pumps) for a day.

Ian said...

'just for the record and to give you a picture of this particular scenario:
this dude called me 'honey' three times, told me i had beautiful eyes
and then came back with "i probably shouldn't be flirting on company time"'

I dont get it. That happens to me where ever i go. haha.

Macgyver said...

Well, I can safely say I STILL don't get the woman/shoe thing. They're nice and all but don't get it.

Of course I geek out over movies and stuff so....

Anonymous said...

This is one of your best. It is simple and funny. It tells me about what you do and how you interact with the world around you. You wear those shoes to Home Depot, lady! This is the second product placement I've noticed today in my Vblog watching. I guess this would be an attempt on their part to get women to hang out there? clever marketing.
Mica

Steve Garfield said...

I like how ANT encourages comments.

I liked the music.

I like Home Depot.

Anonymous said...

Dear ryanne:
You're absolutey right. It is about empowerment. It is about manipulation and control. Its about a woman using the best power she can muster to get guys to do anything that she wants. Because guys are stupid and are willing to hand over all control when they think they can impress or even get lucky with a girl. Of course the great irony here is that when women dress and act and do things a certain way in order to send out a signal to men that says "maybe" and when the dumb ass guy falls all over himself and capitulates to whatever the woman wants, the woman then goes "eewww, he's gross, get out of here, you're weird, get away". So maybe it is just a show of empowerment to the woman, maybe she just needs to show herself that she can be attractive to men, that SHE can manipulate them and control them, NOT them doing that to her. So maybe thats why you dress a certain way and act a certain way and talk and move and react to these guys a certain way. Maybe its YOU that brings out dumb ass comments like "you have beautiful eyes" etc. Perhaps the guys are just following your lead, to which I say WAY TO GO! If they're dumb enough to fall for that stuff then they deserve to be manipulated. Hook a big fat chain through that ring in their nose and lead them around like a bunch of braying asses, making them do your bidding. For perhaps you have way more "empowerment" than you know. And lets face it. It feels good to have power. Just try to not abuse it too much.

ryanne hodson said...

dear anonymous
empowerment is not necessarily about manipulation.
control, certainly.
it's obvious that you feel a certain vulnerability to women like myself (do i know you?) for writing such a comment.
you are acting like i stroll into home depot like some dolled up hoochie batting my eye lashes and dumbly asking where the drill bits are, as you put it "in order to send out a signal to men that says 'maybe' "
and by that i mean manipulating this poor fuck into telling me my eyes are beautiful and, by the way, the drill bits are in isle 8.
yeah, this is how i act towards men.
right.
i think you know be better than that. certainly if you watch my videos everyday you might get a sense of me. judging by the comments you have left
i know you too.
our friendship has not been pretty lately.
hence the "guys are stupid and are willing to hand over all control when they think they can impress or even get lucky with a girl" comment.
though you sign on as anonymous
i know you better than that.
punk.

up until the 1970s women have had little to no voice or power in this world.
it's about fucking time we re-claimed it.
and lead all you 'braying asses' around by your, well, you know.
what do you say to that Mister ANONYMOUS?

Lez said...

I'm offended if I walk into Home Depot and a worker *doesn't* hit on me. Dammit.

Power on...

Dooser said...

You're right, he should have been hitting on you today. You look especially attractive today.

(And I was thinking of that, and planning on complimenting you, _before_ I got to the Home Depot part. I suppose Dooser wants to go to Home Depot now; Dooser feels left out.)

Anonymous said...

You know? Sometimes when I'm lonely and horny, I put on a little orange Home Depot vest and walk around Home Depot hitting on girls. Even better I like to wear an adult diaper at the same time.

Hey just kidding (about the vest, diaper stays). I liked the edit. And I get a hellova rise out of the comments section.

Shannon

Anonymous said...

you're right, i am freaking out! those shoes are amazing!
i love you and your sexxy shoes ryan.

ashley-your jelous sister

Anonymous said...

Dear Ryanne:
You got me on this one. Two things however: there is more than one anonymous. The other one has come up with better stuff than me, so I have backed out for awhile. And, there is nothing more appealing than a dolled up hootchie who is also smart as hell. WOW!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for getting back to real life. I loved this piece!
Its so nice to see truth online.

Anonymous said...

Is this post being paid for by a new product placement deal with Home Depot? Whenever I hear women say that they are hot it usually raises a big orange flag.

"We are thrilled to be involved with an innovative and exciting reality production company that is committed to showcasing The Home Depot brand and services in the content of the shows," said John Costello, executive vice president of Merchandising and Marketing for Home Depot. "This new partnership enables us to continually reach our target audiences in unique ways." Link.

-Drew

ryanne hodson said...

dear anonymous,
if you don't sign your name, you are all the same to me.
stay in your nice cozy den of anonymity.
i'll keep putting myself out there for you to comment on, biatch.

Anonymous said...

awww. come on, anonymous!
you're pretty good too! don't be so hard on yourself.
come back. I know you can. Just give it another try.

there's plenty of room. plenty.
dude. you're killing me. stop smiling.

Sharyn Morrow said...

All these anonymouses are weird. Why the fixation on Home Depot? To me this was all about the elusive thrift store victory, which is what gets me hot, personally. Great post :-)

Anonymous said...

i think the most contentious issue of this comment stream has been that the first person who commented presumed that the people who work at home depot give good service! i have NEVER been to a home depot and had good service. NEVER. Nor do i know anyone who has. Maybe it's just an LA thing but everyone I know knows that home depot and good service are two things never mentioned in the same breath. and i'm *very* offended by anyone who tries to make out like it's different. it's like saying the holocaust didn't happen or something. talk about women's rights - just two months ago, i had to handcuff myself to a stack off two by fours and threaten to stay past closing in order to find out which type of wood is least likely to bow for the bookshelves i'm building. it was then that i remembered that it's open 24hours...

Lisa

annie! said...

I liked this post. Cool scores at the thrift store. That's always rad.

Hmm, funny. The people at Home Depot have always been pleasant to me. Once I needed couldn't find this plastic tubing I needed, and the guy escorted me to the aisle. Upon seeing that the box was empty, he ran to fetch the mobile ladder/platform thing, climbed to the top of the shelf, cut open the box, and got me my tubing. Rock on for home depot.

/end offtopic-ness.

So anyway, Ryan, this was rad. keep up the good work.

Anonymous said...

HOME DEPOT is indeed a great place to pick up a few things. Even a woman who might otherwise feel uncomfortable or out of her element in a typical hardware store, will find herself right at home here. Our staff makes sure to take special care with female customers. Compliments make women feel special at a time when they perhaps are feeling vulnerable or confused.

Anonymous said...

Dear Other Anonymous:
Thank you for the words of encouragement. You're right. There's plenty of room for us anonymouses. Why the hell not! And don't we write the most interesting and provocative stuff? Maybe that's because of our anonymity. It gives us freedom to express what we want without all that baggage that personality gives us. Hmmmm. Or maybe it's just fun to be anonymous. Whatever. Anyways, thanks. I'm still in (as long as Ryanne doesn't edit me out). And I think she won't. Because she certainly seems open to discussion, no matter how much she disagrees with the opinions being expressed. Thak you Ryanne.

Anonymous said...

you ARE cute. hot damn! i once scored some so-sexy-fits-me-perfectly-who-cares-what-color-socks boots at savers. it was glorious. i still wear them all the time. any guy or girl would be smart to hit on you. no matter where you're shopping. it isn't about manipulation or empowerment or even product placement. it is quite simply about ryanne being irresistably FINE. sexy, smart, and a video genious. if i weren't 3000 miles away, i'd be hitting on you too!
... hey, baby, nice shoes...
what a great video
~mae

*** said...

you are back in full form, my friend...
high heels club forevah...I still have the rockin' mauve heeled boots you gave me...they give me shin splints when I dance in them, so maybe I'll just wear them to get the Depot discount.

god that sounds so slutty.
but it's all about empowerment.
haha...HA...
good work~(;

Bitchslapper said...

...um, he he. No, you're not cute. Get a doctor to shave off some excess poundage from that nose of yours. A bit full of yourself, and perhaps some other post-digestive matter, but cute? Nope.

Bitchslapper said...

email: anything@ebtalkingpoints.com

Lay it on, snatchbreath.

ryanne hodson said...

ha ha!
man oh man.
the peanut gallery has arrived.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Mau said...

Heh.. I work at home depot.
I've got older ladies hit on me.
..about.. eh.. 8 to today's date?
So yeah, I agree with the "women surrounded by all that hardware" part.
..haha.